Horoscopes For Those Trying To Feel Human Emotions
Aries
Stoicism is overrated. I mean, it looks very cool if you are Sean Bean playing pretty much any character, but I’m suspicious about how well it actually works out in real life. I’m not convinced that stoicism isn’t a way to hedge yourself against vulnerability, to keep yourself safe from a certain amount of intimacy with the people close to you. I’m challenging you this month to say out loud, and to the people that matter, what you think and feel, and how you feel about them. People like to know they’re in the thoughts of those they love. There’s a certain kind of magic when you can take the things you hold close inside you and release them out into the open. Even Ned Stark meant to do it eventually, but then Joffrey cut his head off and he never got the chance. You have the chance right now.
Taurus
You guys are stubborn as hell. That’s not always a bad thing! Standing your ground and defending it can mean that you know your boundaries and are willing to speak up when someone starts to cross them. Remember that the traits that sometimes get you in trouble are also the traits that make you excel; it’s all in how you focus it. If you are going to die on a hill, consider why it’s that one.
Gemini
What are you holding on to too tightly? What are you afraid of? Fear is handy, because it teaches us that we can’t just go traipsing around wherever we want, whenever we want without there being consequences. For example, if you are a surfer, fearing a 10 foot wall of water thundering towards you seems like a natural and reasonable reaction. However, remember that you are out in that ocean for a reason and you’re going to have to let go of your board and pop on up if you want to ride that wave, my dude. A consequence of you doing that might be that you die, but it probably won’t.
Cancer
It seems I’ve written a lot about death this month. As your (non) astrologer I am going to interpret that to mean that this month is all about the little deaths that happen to us all internally. It’s also called change, or closure. A little internal death doesn’t have to mean that we hollow ourselves out on the inside, but can instead mean that we allow the things we no longer need to dissipate, dissolve, disperse. These are all soft words for saying, “You’re going to need room for other things, so let’s free up some f*cking space.”
Leo
If the Stark’s words are “Winter is Coming” maybe the words for our collective world should be “Climate Change is Coming”. It’s been a very long summer, friends, and the Night (Climate Change) King and his army of White Walkers and Wights are upon us. For those of you who don’t watch Game of Thrones I am not referring to Trump, Republicans, and the members of the Westboro Baptist Church, though I suppose they could sub in just as easily. I’m referring to the army of the dead that are about to descend upon the fictional world of Westeros when the final season of Game of Thrones begins. We don’t live in a fictional world with an HBO CGI budget, but our threat is just as real. Leading scientists have given us 10 years before the earth really falls to sh*t if we don’t clean up our act, literally. Leos, are you pre-occupied with defending the Iron Throne, with holding your position, or are you ready to ride North? Winter is coming.
Virgo
Sometimes things get so serious we forget along the way to have fun. Sometimes a little moment of levity is the breath of fresh air we need to continue marching forward. If you’ve been paying attention you’ve noticed a few different themes floating around this month, and despite some of their weightiness remember that a good laugh is a good way to take you out of your head long enough to clear your perspective. Even Jon Snow can’t brood all the time.
Libra
Consider that everything you think you know or hold true may one day blow up in your face. Consider that this isn’t your fault, but that this is a way to take inventory of all the things you know and ask how you know them. Who told you that was the way it’s supposed to be? Where did you learn that from? I think as women especially we are taught in so many unconscious ways how to fold ourselves into the men in our lives; how to be good and how to serve the men around us; how to make ourselves small enough to disappear. How can you make yourself big? How can you be good to you and serve yourself? Men, same questions, but be aware of how much space you are naturally given and how you might share it.
Scorpio
You guys need to chill the f*ck out already.
Sagittarius
What are you passively consuming, mentally, emotionally, physically? You can do something actively and be still; your hands and mind don’t always have to be reaching for something. We fill ourselves so easily with things we aren’t even aware of, and then wonder why we are so tired. Give yourself a rest, a real rest. Get as into this or not as you wish. My go-to is to lie down on my living room floor with my legs propped up on my chaise lounge, some tea tree and cedarwood oil on the diffuser, some sort of relaxation/meditation music, and an optional novelty sleep mask. Game of Thrones starts on the 14th of this month and you are going to want to be bright eyed and bushy tailed for the final season of what is arguably THE GREATEST SHOW OF ALL TIME. Can you tell I’m excited??
Capricorn
What is it about letting your insides show that makes you a little anxious? Recently my boss gave me an over-sized puzzle piece that I was supposed to colour or paint as part of a larger art wall. I decided I didn’t want to be constrained by the limits of two dimensions and instead made it into a 3D puzzle piece of an abstract person ripping open their chest and spilling out its contents. I wanted to attach my favourite Cheryl Strayed quote, “Let yourself be gutted. Let it open you. Start there.” But seeing as we work in emergency services that was shot down pretty quickly.
Aquarius
When was the last time you cleaned your bathtub? Are you supposed to clean them with your clothes on? It always seems like they take forever to scrub and everything gets wet and water gets all over the floor and eventually you give up, get naked, turn the shower on, and just scrub everything frantically and haphazardly while silently promising yourself to never let it go this long again. This is of course a metaphor and not a very candid re-telling of actual events.
Pisces
What were we saying about stoicism- it gets your head chopped off? Pisces, I am not a real astrologer and have no idea if you are prone to that kind of detachment, but regardless I am imploring you to keep your head firmly on your body. This month, do not die; you’re going to want to know how Game of Thrones ends.
