Emoticopes: Death Becomes Her/Them

Emotiscopes

Horoscopes For Those Trying To Feel Human Emotions 

 

 

Aries

 

I keep having dreams/nightmares that wake me up. I wake up and realize I’m crying. It’s very hard to shake. I’m becoming uneasy about going to sleep which is pretty inconvenient because recently I’m not really enjoying being awake either. Welcome to hell.

 

Taurus

 

If I haven’t responded to you or called or texted please know it is because I’m deeply depressed most of the time and struggling to find the energy to be passably human. Yesterday I was trying to set some goals and said to myself, "If I could go in the ocean every day I'd be a relatively nice, mentally balanced person." And I realized this was true but also an unrealistic goal.

 

Gemini

 

Sometimes I come home from work and go directly to bed because it is the only place that feels easy enough to exist in. I’m typing this as I’m lying in bed because I was afraid that if I didn’t stay in bed and chanced being out in the world, someone might look at me the wrong way and I’d lose it on them. Sometimes there’s so much anger in me I can feel my whole body vibrating in this painful and unceasing way that I can only dull with a lot more sleep medication than I’m supposed to take.

Cancer

 

I know if I keep waking up eventually I’ll feel different.

 

Leo

 

I just want to eat burgers and cheesecake on an endless loop. For the last year I’ve had this never ending hunger that doesn’t go away and I feel like I’m eating myself alive/to death.

 

Virgo

 

Probably for just about always until now you knew me as a woman. This is no more. I am neither a woman or a man but maybe also both so please just think of me as a person now. You can say, “Natalie is a non-binary person, isn’t that great/wonderful/exciting/something to celebrate?!?” If you hear someone mention me using she/her pronouns if you could gently correct them with they/them pronouns that would mean the world to me. Thank-you, I love you.

 

Libra

 

One day this will all get better and you have so many new and exciting things to stress-eat about.

 

Scorpio

 

You guys need to chill the fuck out. 

 

Sagittarius

 

Just because you are depressed doesn’t mean you can’t brush your teeth.

 

Capricorn

 

Maybe you drink too much too often.

 

Aquarius 

 

What if this is all a dystopian fever dream and Hillary actually won in 2016?

 

Pisces

 

What if we’re already all dead/alive?